I, Rachel Peters, was raised in an old, abandoned mineshaft, by a family of bumblebees.
From an early age I knew I had a gift. While my brothers and sisters were squirming around in their larvae state, I was teaching myself biochemistry, quantum physics, and Internet web design. Everyone said I was the smart one in the family. …Well, that’s what they would have said, if they had had vocal chords. They actually danced a little dance to tell me. Roughly translated, it said, “You’re the smart one. …and the pollen is over there, 2.5 miles. Turn left at the tree”.
We were a poor family, but a happy one. And the time came one day for me to leave the hive and set out into the world. I had nothing to my name but a chicken sandwich and a lump of coal. I named them Mary-Kate and Ashley. They were my only friends.
So, off I trotted. I walked and I walked. I walked until my little feet bled. I walked until my spleen swelled, and I could feel nothing but numbness from my waist down. I walked until I passed out in the ditch.
…And, well… I woke up here, in front of this glowing computer, trying fill a website with a fine display of my work.
The details of everything in between are pretty blurry, but somehow I became a super hero - that much I remember. And now it’s my job to save the world from certain gloom.
Sure, at times I still miss my family, but I have a mission now — a greater purpose! There’s a stench of boredom in the air, and it needs a Glade Plug-in!
And by gum! I AM THAT GLADE PLUG-IN!!!
Birthday: Canada Day and proud of it.
Favourite books: The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupéry); The Problem of Pain (CS Lewis); The Pursuit of God (A.W. Tozer); Disappointment with God (Philip Yancey); most anything else non-fiction by CS Lewis.
“You know, I think people would be surprised to know how little I actually think.”
~ Dad Peters
“I never said that!”
~ Mom Peters
“Money is not an object. …Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say, ‘object’? I meant, ‘option’. Money is not an option.”
~Rachel Peters and Angie Pajek collaborative quote.
“I don’t get along with people when I first meet them. My wife says it’s because I act like I’m better than they are. I don’t think I do. …Although I usualy am.”
~Robert “Butterfly Man” Nelson.
I understand too little too late
I realize there are things you say and do
You can never take back
But what would you be if you didn’t even try
You have to try
So after a lot of thought
I’d like to reconsider
If it’s not too late
Make it a cheeseburger”
Favourite music: Lots and lots. Anything felt. Lots of Joni Mitchell and Stevie Wonder.
Favourite colour: All of them and any more you can make from all of them.
Favourite cheese: Baby Bell gouda.
Favourite things to draw: hands, noses, eyes and ears; chairs.
Comedy vs. Drama: comedy wins. …In some cases, dramady.
If I could be anything other than what I am: I have had a life long dream to grow up to be a puppy.